We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
