david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
