You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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