Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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