I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
