Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
You pole danced in your parka.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
