Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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