I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
