i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
