32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
