if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Randomize