Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Randomize
