I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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