i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
