its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
