i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
