my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
my liver is dry heaving
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
