That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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