It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Randomize
