I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
