She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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