The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
he fucked my hip out of place.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Sorry about my life...
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
