One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
