You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
