No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
