Pass out mid-funnel last night.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Randomize