brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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