Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Randomize
