Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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