It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Randomize
