You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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