I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
