real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Pappa wants mamma naked
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
