Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Randomize
