I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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