A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
