is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Randomize
