Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
