Banned from zoo.
Again?
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
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