can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
