so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Randomize
