We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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