whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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