She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Randomize
