sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Floor bacon is actually really good
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
