capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize