I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
