so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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