gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize