I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
