I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Randomize
