we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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