We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
You are a genius and a whore.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
